Top 67 Funny Motivational Quotes to Inspire You “Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there. -Josh Billings
Short funny quotes: Looking for some brilliantly humorous quotes that motivate? Discover our selection of the funniest motivational quotes of all time.
#1. Do it now. Sometimes later becomes never.”
#2. Don’t ruin a good today by thinking about a bad yesterday. Let it go.”
#3. The fact that there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.”
#4. Never be afraid to try something new, because life gets boring when you stay within the limits of what you already know”
#5. Don’t underestimate me. I know more than I say, think more than I speak, and notice more than you realize.”
#6. Time is free, but it’s priceless. You can’t own it, but you can use it. You can’t keep it, but you can spend it. Once you’ve lost it you can never get it back.”
#7. It’s better to be late, than to arrive ugly.”
#8. It will never be perfect. Make it work.”
#9. I never lose. Either I win or I learn.”
#10. Don’t stop until you’re proud”
#11. An attitude of #Whatever is convenient” won’t accomplish very much. An attitude of #Whatever it takes” is impossible to stop.”
#12. A diamond is a chunk of coal that did well under pressure”
#13. I do a thing called what I want.”
#14. When I’m sad I just sing, and then I realize my voice is worse than my problems.”
#15. Do the right thing, even when no one is looking it’s called integrity.”
#16. Lick the back of your hand. That’s what a winner tastes like.”
#17. I’m not lazy, I’m just very relaxed.”
#18. Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.”
Funny Quotes and Sayings
#19. A secret to happiness is letting every situation be what it is, instead of what you think it should be.”
#20. Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.”
#21. Create the life you can’t wait to wake up to”
#22. When someone says you can’t do it. Do it twice, and take pictures.”
#23. One day… I’m gonna make the onions cry.”
#24. Work hard in silence. Let success be your noise.”
#25. They’re called ‘Man Hours’ because a woman would have that shit done in 20 minutes!”
#26. Complaining about a problem without posing a solution is called whining.”
#27. When you learn how much you’re worth, you’ll stop giving people discounts.”
#28. Forget all the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason why it will.”
#29. The comeback is always stronger than the setback”
#31. That annoying moment when you are texting someone and auto correct decides to join the conversation.”
#32. Don’t stress the struggle. It builds character.”
#33. I am not lazy I am on energy saving mode”
#34. If you have been trying to force a relationship to work, take a step back from your visions of the future with this person and allow yourself to be totally present. How do you feel with them, right here and now. Is this connection serving you, right here and now.”
Funny Quotes About Friends
#35. I refuse to entertain negativity. Life is too big and time is too short to get caught up in empty drama.”
#36. People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.”
#37. I’m on the hunt for who I’ve not yet become.”
#38. I know I’m on the right path because things stopped being easy.”
#39. The longer you live in the past, the less future you have to enjoy.”
#40. I’m a thinker, not a talker.”
#41. #Monslay I’m alive. I’m motivated. I’m determined. I will slay Monday.”
#42. Don’t wish for it. Work for it.”
#43. Just because the past didn’t turn out like you wanted it to, doesn’t mean your future can’t be better than you ever imagined.”
#44. Before you speak, listen. Before you write, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you invest, investigate. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try.”
#45. If the plan doesn’t work change the plan but never the goal”
#46. Never announce your moves before you make them”
#47. I’m sorry, my days of chasing people are over. If you’re not making an effort to stay in my life, don’t get upset when I start doing things without you.”
Funny Quotes About Work
#48. Before going to sleep every night, forgive everyone and sleep with a clean heart.”
#49. The best view comes after the hardest climb”
#50. Life always offers you a second chance, it’s called tomorrow.”
#51. If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge???”
#52. If thought bubbles appeared above my head, I’d be screwed…”
#53. You learn nothing from life if you think you’re right all the time.”
#54. Replace what-ifs and should-haves with fuck-yeahs and no-regrets”
#55. At this age I’m only interested in consistency, stability, respect and loyalty.”
#56. Unsuccessful people make decisions based on their current situation; successful people make decisions based on where they want to be.”
#57. I didn’t come this far to only come this far.”
#60. What is coming, is better than what has gone”
#61. Your smile is your logo, your personality is your business card, how you leave others feeling after an experience with you becomes your trademark.”
#62. The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to forget is the happiest.”
#63. I don’t sugar coat shit, I’m not willy wonka.”
#64. Just in case no one told you today: Hello good morning you’re doing great I believe in you nice butt”
#65. Overthinking the art of creating problems that weren’t even there.”
#66. No one is going to stand up at your funeral and say, #They had a really expensive couch and great shoes.” Don’t make life about stuff.”